The Importance of Intergenerational Friendships at Church

For many years, our church had two worship services. The early service (8:30 am) tended to be preferred by the older members of our congregation, while the later service (11:00 am) was the preference of the younger members, which included a good number of college students.
Providentially, due to our sanctuary being expanded and remodeled, for a number of months we met together in one worship service in our newly constructed gym. During that time, we worshipped with members of our church that we rarely saw because they attended the service that we didn’t. That was quite a joy.

And later, the leaders of the church made the decision that moving forward, we would only have one worship service. If the church continued to grow, we would plant a church, rather than going back to two services.
It is important to have friendships with all generations at church. Here are a few examples of what that may look like:

1. Recently, for about four years, I was able, along with my pastor, to be a part of a cohort of young men who were studying to be pastors, some of whom were about forty years younger than me. I really enjoyed being around and getting to know these men, and hearing their perspectives.
2. My wife Tammy loves to participate in our church’s ladies Bible studies, serving as a leader. There are morning and evening class options. Tammy chooses the evening classes which is where the majority of the young working women attend. She loves getting to know these women. For example, a mom who has raised 7 children can speak into the life of a struggling new mom and encourage her.
3. We participate in a small group, which includes fellowship, discussion of that morning’s sermon and prayer. When you meet with a group on a regular basis you are able to build friendships. While the majority of the members of our group are our age, we do have a few members who are much younger than us. We love getting to know them, hear their perspective, pray for them, etc.
4. In our church leadership group, I am now the oldest elder. Our newest elder is about 38 years younger than me, and the remainder are a mix of ages. We all work together to help lead and shepherd the church.
5. Another way to build friendships across generations is by inviting someone out for coffee or a meal.

I encourage you to make friendships with those that are not in your particular age group. You need to be intentional about this – it won’t necessarily happen naturally. We can all learn from each other, support and pray for one another.

What suggestions would you have to add to what I’ve listed above?